Lolita Fashion Diary: #16 - Lifestyle Lolitas.

Hello, my darling dears!

Recently I've been doing some research on 'Lifestyle Lolitas' and found some really interesting stuff. Something I've noticed a lot is that there are so many questions asked about living the lolita lifestyle that I've decided to paraphrase a couple of them and give my own answers right here! Here we go then! c:


1. What is a lifestyle lolita?
(A summary of what I've seen and can interpret.)

Lifestyle lolitas tend to lean towards certain common interests, along with wearing lolita on a daily basis these interest also include similar music, literature and deco tastes, but also interest in certain activities and pass times. 
Many lifestyle lolitas base their time around doing certain activities, these include; embroidery, reading classic literature, listening to and/or attending classical music recitals, having tea parties and just doing generally outdated things for fun. That isn't saying that these things can't be fun, because they most certainly can, but they are definitely part of a previous generation rather than a present one. To be honest, it's nice to see things such as tea parties and classical literature still being practised and appreciated and that's one of the awesome things about the generalised version of a lifestyle lolita! However, it seems a little off putting and weird if some lolitas who are lifestyle only do these things to deem themselves worthy of the Lifestyle Lolita title...


2. Is the idea of 'lifestyle lolitas' open to interpretation?

I have seen this question asked so many times and I'm really glad that I have! There are so many lolitas (usually those who are not lifestyle lolitas) who say that the concept of lifestyle lolitas is exactly that, just an abstract idea. Nothing is really set in stone. Seeing this made me very happy indeed. 

Some lolitas, myself included, don't really enjoy classical music or even like drinking tea that much, but it seems a bit mean to not include them in the 'lolita lifestyle' term just because they don't like certain things. One blog I came across explained about how a group of lifestyle lolitas meet up together to listen to rock and metal music, while they drank tea and baked delicious treats. It is not fair to exclude them from the term because they share a different music taste... but ostracising lolitas for this exact reason is apparently very common. Some lolitas boldly claim that lolitas (especially sweet and OTT sweet lolitas) cannot call themselves lifestyle lolitas if they don't adhere to the common idea of what a lolita should like. This is a little degrading and down right rude. If all lolitas were the same in this respect, there wouldn't be any where near as much diversity within communities as there is. So... why is think kind of thing still being said?

Now, lolitas do have to adhere to certain things to be called a lolita, but that is more of a fashion thing. If you don't fit the silhouette, don't call it lolita. That is understandable. This... not so much. Surely if you're wearing it regularly and have two or even one common adorable interests it really shouldn't be an issue and the term lifestyle lolita can still be applied. Actually, even with no other common interests other than lolita, it should still be applicable.


3. What do you think a lolita needs to do to be called a lifestyle lolita?
Just two things.

1. Wear lolita on a regular basis. 

Of course this is the most obvious and if this one isn't met, then there is no way someone can be a lifestyle lolita, no matter how determined they are. However, not all days and activities are suitable for lolita, so boasting about wearing lolita every single day is unrealistic even for lifestyle lolitas. Some can achieve this, most cannot, and it's important to understand that and 9/10 lolitas do, so that's good! Personally I believe wearing lolita 5 days a week is suitable for someone to be termed a lifestyle lolita. You're living your personal lifestyle in lolita and that's all you can ask for!

2. Learn about and practise etiquette. 

 Lolita is a very proud and elegant fashion no matter which style you choose, having a certain kind of etiquette is definitely important. To be able to carry the look but still keep a comfortable atmosphere for yourself and those around you being kind and considerate at all times is a must, not only for when wearing lolita but in general. It's important that you represent the community even if you aren't wearing lolita. As well as this, the lolita look comes with a certain kind of expectation. It appears sloppy and unnatractive if lolitas are being rude and unruly. That is not to say that lolitas cannot be fun and have debates, but keeping it civilised and calm is probably the best way to go about it without tarnishing the lolita name. 



These two things are my personal view on what makes a lolita a lifestyle lolita, everything else is optional. Music taste, deco style, literature taste, movie taste, just have fun and share what you like! You never know, you may actually find something new you do like and didn't even know existed! 


3. Why do you think you do/don't fit the idea of a 'lifestyle lolita'?  

There are a couple of reasons why I don't fit the lifestyle lolita criteria. That is the general idea and my own.  The first reason is I don't wear lolita very often at all. Special occasions and when I feel like dressing up are the only days i'll wear it, any other time I'm in my comfortable jeans and a band shirt. The second reason is my taste in music and deco completely contrast with my lolita style, which is mostly sweet. I love rock and metal music and my deco style is quite gothic. To a general lifestyle lolita this mismatch would be a disaster. But that's fine, because I'm not a lifestyle lolita and I'm cool with not being one. I have the freedom to wear what I like, and I love it!

4. Is there anything wrong with a lifestyle lolita 'taking a day off'?

Short answer, no.
Long answer, noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo.
Ahem... Like previously stated lolita is definitely not suited to every situation. If you're doing gardening (like heavy duty stuff) you're not going to wear lolita. If you're baking in the kitchen, you may well want to wear lolita with a little apron just in case. Different times call for different clothing, and even lifestyle lolitas are entitled to have a day off from the exhausting fashion. I'm not even a lifestyle lolita and I know how stressful lolita can be! 
So, no, definitely not. 


5. Do you think being a lifestyle lolita makes you more of a lolita?

Short answer, no.
Long answer, noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo- ahem, sorry, I'll stop this now.
No, nothing can make someone "more" of a lolita than any other lolita who chooses to wear the fashion. If you wear lolita, then you are a lolita and that is that. You aren't more or less because you embroider or wear brand or have tea parties all the time. To me that just seems ridiculous. Lolita is a fashion first and foremost, so anything else is entirely optional. That includes my idea of lifestyle lolitas having nice etiquette. Formal manners just aren't for everyone, and I accept that! What another lolita chooses to do in their lives is up to them, other lolitas can only offer suggestions that they not wear lolita in times that they are in risk of damage and/or staining.


8. What little things can lolitas do to make their lives more loli-ish?

This again depends entirely on a lolitas personal choices, but there are several common things that lolitas are known to enjoy doing and are closely associated with the fashion. For example, decorating things. Anything from books to shoes are decorated in cute items such as bows, adhesive rhinestones and other little trinkets to achieve a cute or elegant look, it's fun to do it alone or in a little group of your frilly friends.

Have (tea) parties. I personally love tea parties and even had one for my 18th birthday. They are widely loved by lolitas even if tea isn't directly involved. A little get together with juice and cakes is just as good. You'd be hard pressed to find a lolita who had never thought about having a tea party or wondered what it was like to have or go to one...
Try baking really cute things! Baking is a popular activity among many lolitas! Favoured things to bake are cookies, muffins and cupcakes, pancakes and of course macarons! I love baking, too, but I've never baked in lolita, i'd be too worried about getting it dirty!

Have a lolita sleep over with your friends! Swapping coord advice, hair and makeup tips and telling stories together can be really fun! And if you're really pressed for things to do, bringing items of your wardrobe to swap and try on can bring hours of amusement, especially when a mix-match coord is made and actually works! And if you're all ready to settle, putting on a movie for everyone to watch is a nice way to wind down. Popular choices are of course, the famous Kamikaze Girls, Alice in Wonderland, Pride and Prejudice and Marie Antoinette. These are films that can be in some way linked to the idea of lolita, the style and/or history of lolita. It's a nice idea to round off the night! However, if that isn't your cup of tea, you could always watch something else! My ultimate favourite movie of all time has to be The Labyrinth. It would be incredibly easy to take inspiration from The Labyrinth for lolita, it's a very quirky and fun movie!
That's my take on lifestyle lolitas m'lovelies! Hope you enjoyed reading it! Until next time.

 

Lolita Fashion Diary: #15 - My Wish List (Update #1)

Hello, my darlings.So recently I updated my wish list and would like to share it here on my blog! I seriously need to invest in some of these lovely dresses! Enjoy!

Lolita Fashion Diary: #14 - Why the colour white is a god send.

Hello, my darling dears!

So recently I've been ripping my hair out trying to sort out coordinates with the Lolita clothing I have acquired thus far. I've read so many blogs on how to make pieces go further in several coordinates, but I was stuck in a rut for a really long time. I had no idea how to be able to wear my pieces without having anything that really 'went' with the main piece itself. 

I know what you're thinking, 'Jess, seriously, if you have nothing to match a dress and or skirt how are you supposed to wear it?' Well, this is where a stroke of genius I discovered through another lolita blogger comes in. For sweet lolitas the most popular colours are various shades of pink, sax, lavender and mint. Let's be honest, it's difficult to find a sweet lolita (unless they're a bitter sweet lolita, and even then they probably still own something in one of these colours,) who doesn't own something in one of these colours.

Originally I was headed completely towards gothic lolita, for one of two reasons. I love the colour black, and it looked easy to coordinate. (I have learned it is definitely not!) The second reason is that I was obsessed with the gothic lolita look. It's extremely elegant and just so mystical, which I love! I didn't anticipate becoming a sweet lolita, though. When I found the other styles I loved them immediately, and to be honest, gothic didn't really get a look in. So almost all of the lolita pieces I own are in the 'sweet lolita colours'. My immediate problem was that I literally had nothing I could use to make a full coordinate. Then I remembered that white goes with EVERYTHING. I own white shoes, a white shirt, a white bag. The idea I had read about said to just get things that go with EVERYTHING to make coordinates easier.

Anyone can do this if they have a neutral colour like white to go with their main pieces. This kind of coordinate only needs a couple of accent touches to match the main piece to give it an edge. Using things such as earrings and bangles in the main piece's colour to match it just gives it a bit of spice while wearing other white items. Let me show you some of my coordinations as examples.

This coordination's main colour is pink. Pink goes fantastically well with white. This kind of simple coordination  idea makes sure that the dress is the centre of attention, but small details like accent colour jewellery gives it an edge to make it a little more balanced. If you have a bag that has the accent colour as well as the base white colour, that would be great to use, too! It balances out the coordinate and also compliments the dress with the accented colour. 

This coordinate is in the popular 'hime lolita' style. Literally 'princess lolita'. In this kind of coordinate the white colour is extremely elegant and the focus again is on the dress. Having small accessories in white, such as lace gloves and a pearl tiara can turn certain dresses from a normal lolita dresses to a princess dress, which is always fabulous! As with the above coordination adding small acessories with the accent colour is a good idea, especially to draw attention to small details such as rings and necklaces, which let's be honest, get a little less attention!

This coordinate is extremely casual and very simple. Skirts like this one are fabulously convenient because you don't have to worry about head wear as you can just use your skirt bow! This will help to balance the coordinate which may seem unbalanced due to the bright print of the skirt. I have gone against the "white" rule a little bit here with the black top, but I prefer to have that solid contrast with this skirt. 
As you can see there are several cross-overs in these coodinates. The shoes, the bag and the ring feature in every coordinate because they fit nicely with them all without being out of place or over powering.




I would say it's definitley a good idea to stock up on versatile peices that can be spread throughout your coordinates such as white shoes, a white blouse, a white bag and white accessories. It gives you something to wear with most if not all of your main pieces so nothing is neglected. Don't forget, white isn't just for when you can't find anything to fit with your outfit, it's also a gorgeous colour just by itself! Don't neglect the idea of an all white coordinate, either! Shiro lolita is not nearly as popular as it used to be and I think that is such a shame! It definitely needs to come back! I'm currently working on a shiro coord myself, I'll post it when it's all finished!
In addition to this it's also interesting to think about the opposite. If you're a lolita that prefers the darker side of the colour spectrum you might want to consider black extras to go with a lot of your coordinates! To be honest this isn't something I have looked into as I only have one or two pieces that would match with black accessories. Although, looking at the last coordinate I was just wondering if swapping the black shirt with a white one and all the white accessories to black whether it would work! Maybe I'll try it out and I'll post it to see what everyone thinks!


I just need to add here that I am still a new lolita, but I blog here so I can share what I have learned and hopefully pass on what I have learned to other new lolitas. I know I will definitley make some mistakes during this blog and would absolutely love to have other lolitas give me their corrections and suggestions! Please comment if you have anything you would like to suggest! I appreciate all criticisms and additional comments. Thank you. :}